Say I have March of the Machines and Chaos Confetti in play, and I cast Mobile Clone, targeting Chaos Confetti. If I then activate the ability of the phone creature artifact, do I have to destroy my phone?

You are allowed to represent the copy token with a Magic card at any point, so you can use that during the activation of Chaos Confetti.

Re: Cryptic Spires. It feels a little disingenuous to start comparing a common tapland (less powerful than a guildgate) with similar rarity to a basic land to Chaos Confetti, etc. Can we limit handwringing about the subject to maybe cool feedback that takes the facts into account, maybe just this once? It feels like people are just trying to troll you sometimes.

Some players are trying to troll me every day. : )

After looking at the responses to my “set with both silver and black bordered cards” ask, I genuinely think the nay-sayers never saw or played with Unstable. The three main mechanics of the set are all completely fine for black bordered play. They do not have rules issues. They do not require dexterity. They don’t care about weird traits like set symbols. They are mechanics directly in black border now. Host/Augment is Mutate. Contraptions are Dungeons. Dice rolling is dice rolling. Modern Horizons 2 even had a Squirrel tribal theme! Yet people think silver bordered means Chaos Confetti and Volrath’s Motion Sensor. It’s as out of touch and removed from the reality of the game as thinking “I don’t want to play black border, it’s too competitive because of all the ante cards and it’s all just counterspells and lightning bolts anyway.”

I agree.

"our research shows players aren’t fond of permanently defacing their Magic cards" - You mean there aren't a lot of Ironman Magic playgroups anymore?

No. Fun story. We did market research on Unglued. I was told that the two most unpopular cards were Blacker Lotus and Chaos Confetti by a large margin. The data people doing the market research said that they cross referenced all the various elements - art, name, flavor text - but couldn’t find any correlative connection between these two cards. I said, “Don’t worry. I got it.”

What happens when chaos confetti lands on an augment card but not the host?

When an Augment card is augmented to a Host it’s one creature. Whatever happens to part of it happens to all of it.

Have you thought of return the self destructive element of Blacker Lotus to limited commons in a desire to combat collection creep?

Blacker Lotus was the number one most disliked card on Unglued according to our market research. Chaos Confetti was number two.

Do you think people would like cards that tear things like tokens specifically made to be torn when you use the card? Like day chaos confetti has a tear a confetti token clause instead of tearing the card itself?

My research has basically said people do not enjoy ripping up their own cards.

Un-rules question: Can I "tear" Chaos Confetti and/or Blacker Lotus into a single piece when I use their abilities?

That is not “tearing” under even the loosest of definitions.

Around '98 '99 my brother collected the game and I played occasionally with him. He described some crazy cards to me (Chaos Confetti, The Cheese Stands Alone and later AWOL). I didn't know these were joke cards at the time so, a decade later when I was reminded of the game, I already knew how awesome it is. I'm walking evidence that Un-sets sell MtG.

: ) : )

The local Mormon elders, who cannot use the internet for recreation while on their missions sent me the following question: Hey is there really a magic card called Chaos Confetti? And if so, what does it do? Which broke my irony dampeners.

It is an Unglued card you rip up and toss the pieces. It destroys any card a piece touches.